Not again.

I just woke up not long ago with the same repeated dream i have every single night after one bad incident that caused me to really fall into a state of depression. It was him. The whole scene was repeated in my dream for about a week and its really driving me crazy. I dont understand how i could even think or dream about him when i got so many things in mind during the days and nights to even have time. Occasionally when i pass by certain things we once did or went together my brains would be filled with the past situation. Its not a very nice feeling to feel especially when you know that the one you onced loved dearly has a change of heart and decided to carry on his life without you. It sucks la. It's always a bummer whenever i thought about what he did to me in the past and to top it off, all that happy moments are gone just because of a girl he knew for 2 weeks. Well im not exactly ranting my hearts out but maybe im very reluctent to accept that fact. However, i must really thank my friends for being there close to my heart whenever im feeling always tipsy about that one person. I`ve been missing out the best things in life because im in my own world with the one i thought i would be forever with, (I will never believe in forever now) Friends.

My life is never filled with singlehood for long and maybe thats a mistake i made, rushing into relationships too rashly. When im in singlehood i lean on my friends for shelter and love to make up my loss but when im attatched i dump them all alone. I feel so bad about it even after one year or so. After this whole incident it made me see how important friends are because they are the ones that will always be by ur side no matter what happends, no matter you`re poor or rich, how your temper is like etc. etc. Its no use regretting bout what i did because nothing`s going to change so far as i see, and what i can do now is to make up for loss time and earn back my friends. Because of my loss i might convert all my attnetion and love to my friends :) Oh, and about the depression part, dont worry im countering it. I am totally not suffering from that anymore. I stopped crying 2 days after that incident happened because i dont think crying is gonna do anything bout it. Why should i ruin my happiness just because of one person. :) I`ll be happy. Very happy. if he leaves my life alone.

Meanwhile. I love andre chong/chang. (sorry. LOL) and lewis liu? , and danny ong. :)
Ohhh and i love ng sze zhuang too. and and rachel awww and edwin choochoo, deniseee.
Of course, i love my very abd temper cousin adonia and super gentle cousin adora.
And some other people who heard me rant. :)

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